In the past three weeks or so, I’ve become a lot more aware on how the wedding industry works in this country. And of course I’ve been cynical of every word these venue managers and representatives have uttered to me, but they’ve also provided some great insight and comedy material.
Here are some examples of the people we’ve met:
The One Who Follows the Bayye 2awwa Men Bayyak (My dad is stronger than yours) Approach
This guy already has every single weekend of the summer season booked with weddings- and he’s trying so hard to beat his own record of last year’s 10000 events, or so he makes it seem. So he is very very eager to have you on board as yet another one of his major accomplishments. He’s so in demand that he has to keep pointing that out in between each and every sentence. He also thinks that no other place can offer you what he is offering and you’d surely be at a loss if you didn’t select his place for your dream princess wedding. But if you don’t go with him, then he won’t say no, because people are practically lining up, waiting for him
The One Whose Opinion Is the Only One that Matters
In the case of this guy, any and every idea you will bring to the table that doesn’t seemingly align with his thoughts will get rejected faster than you can blink. Because you know, he’s designed a billion or so weddings, each more intricate than the next so he’s been around way more than you will ever be. He’ll even throw in his opinions on how people should meet and get married, all while sharing his personal life experiences. Watch out around this person and don’t tell him you don’t want your wedding to look like every single other one.
The One Who Really Needs to Work On Her Sales Pitch
Lady, can we please focus on what’s important here? And that’s you showing me your venue and convincing me that this is the ideal place for my event. Not how beautiful I look, how I should get styled on my wedding day, how long my fiance and I have known each other, why are we so delayed in looking for a venue, and the billion of other questions you have in mind. You also cannot forget the keys to the venue which I came to see! How else can I decide if I like this place? Please, stay focused.
The One Who Becomes Your Instant BFF (Whether You Like It Or Not)
Dude, I get it. You’re young-ish, you’re all cool with your Bluetooth headset and all black outfit. You’re probably really fun to be around but you also have a job to do- and that’s sell your location, and consequently help me with the planning should I choose your venue eventually. You cannot, at this point or any, call my fiance to2borni. I don’t even call him that. His own mother doesn’t call him that. You also cannot ask us how we plan to “nwale3ha” (literal translation: set it on fire) and stay up till 4 am by including yourself in this “We. ” I mean, we just met!
The One Who Is Really Nice But Just Doesn’t Have What We’re Looking For
Excellent sales pitch, check. Presentable, check. Knows what he’s talking about, check again. He maintains a huge smile on his face the whole time, talking to us like actual people, asking us about our preferences and such. The only flaw is that there’s no way we’d ever be interested in his location, but at least he tried.
The One Who Ends Up Disappointing You
Okay this one stung a lot, and taught me something about getting excited only to have someone crush it for you. This person was ideal, talking in a way that made us feel that they understood what we wanted and how we wanted to approach our wedding. They promised us they would do their very best, send us pictures, send us packages, meet with us until we were happy, etc… But of course, that’s not what happened. We waited a full week for an email from them, and nothing. Then we emailed back, only to get a super short reply that could only mean they weren’t interested in dealing with us. We sent one more email to which we are yet to get a reply.